The Monarchs executed. Detroit laid an egg. The result: a lopsided, finally squirm-inducing, 24-point beatdown in Auburn Hills, a credit to Sacramento, but not much of an advertisement for the league.

The defending champs did almost everything right: cutting off Detroit's passing lanes, moving the ball intelligently, setting up outside shooters early, and slicing up Detroit's zone late. Sacto's early foul trouble posed no problem: Graham Hays quips that the Monarchs have ten starters.

They also have two sharpshooters. Lawson made six treys, a new playoff record. Powell came to play. Katie Smith sank four treys (the former record) before Sac switched assignments and shut her down.

Swin Cash played eleven minutes and scored no points. Riley played fifteen and scored two. Coach Laimbeer-- why does he let himself wear a mic?-- quarreled with his players, with officials, and even with ESPN's commentators, disputing a foul call after the free throws were done. Penichiero: "When things go wrong, you see [Detroit] pointing fingers."

Fans began leaving the Palace in the third quarter. Talk about giving up too soon: Slovy reminds us that game one in '03 looked just as bad, yet the Shock went on to win it all.

One group of fans went home happy: the Hayniacs from Mason, Michigan traveled to see the former MSU star. Haynie responded with her best work this year: her five steals set a game, and a career high.

Cash tried to explain: "Tomorrow we'll go look at the film and figure out what happened... It's professional sports; you have to have a short memory."

Because the Palace is such an expansive venue, even a good crowd there can underwhelm on TV. A Shock sponsor is giving away tickets to Friday's game: perhaps Cash and Riley will actually attend. And maybe Matt Wurst will get his chicken sandwich.